Like many of you (I suspect), I often see things in my Facebook feed that make me stop, read it, and think about it – at least a little bit. This morning as I scrolled through my feed, enjoying my first cup of coffee, I saw this one and it made me stop and think. I read it; thought about it and read it again. It occurred to me that this list of “Things Money Can’t Buy” are ten things that we, as law enforcement professionals either NEED to have or benefit from having within ourselves. They are character traits that make us better officers OR they are things that help us not lose ourselves in the negativity of the job – or both. Consider them…
Manners: Even when we’re in a fight for our lives and having to deal with the worst our society has to offer, we’re expected to be polite and courteous. While the criminals can yell profanities, curse us, and even spit at us as they hurl their vile hateful insults at us, we’re expected to not take it personally; not feel insulted; not feel anger or frustration. We’re expected to call them “Sir” or “Ma’am” and treat them with politeness. What folks forget is that we too are human and being polite to someone who is being rude in a maximum fashion to you just isn’t easy. Remember though: it IS to your benefit. Somewhere out there is the witness that will say, “That criminal was all kinds of nasty but the police officer was polite and called him ‘sir’ even as he was trying to handcuff him.” (Hopefully such a witness exists.)
Morals: You simply cannot be a police officer without morals. Laws are based on morals. In fact, I believe that laws are our legislature’s way of trying to legalize moral behavior. The challenge is that while we can legalize right and wrong, we can’t legislate moral and immoral because those are circumstance dependent. We, as law enforcement professionals, have to decide, from one moment to the next, what is the moral thing to do in a given situation. We are human; we make mistakes. We still have to try to make moral decisions and live our lives in a moral fashion. We all know that we’re examined under the powerful microscope of societal expectation, so do the best you can in all things.
Respect: This is a two edged sword. We have to show respect to folks who have never earned it, yet we have to earn respect from everyone. “Respect is earned, not given.” That’s an absolutely true statement and we need to remember it as it applies to US getting respect from anyone. On the other hand, we’re expected to treat everyone we deal with with respect, right? I question this. There’s a difference between respect and courtesy. We’re expected to treat everyone with courtesy. The people we have to deal with have to earn our respect just as much as we have to earn theirs. That said, doing the job is a whole lot easier if people respect us. In today’s day and age, with officers being criticized at every turn, the profession as a whole doesn’t carry as much respect as it did, say, fifty years ago. We knew that going in. We shouldn’t let that make us cynical. Act in a way that will earn the respect of those we serve.
Character: “He is a man of good character.” It’s something we all want to believe people say or think about us. We all recognize that you have to be of good character to become a law enforcement professional; or at least there can’t be anything in your background that would lead people to think otherwise. Reality is that being of good character is something that can be tested over and over again in the course of your career. You only have to falter – or be found to have less than perfect character – once for it to haunt you. It’s utterly unfair that we law enforcement professionals are constantly scrutinized to see what kind of human beings we are and then it’s assumed that if we’re less than perfect we always have been and always will be. Don’t let that stop you from being the best person you can be and maintaining your character in a fashion that will never embarrass you when you look in the mirror… or at your children.
Common Sense: I just recently saw a meme that said, “Common sense is a flower that doesn’t grow in everyone’s garden.” Another of my favorites is, “The problem with common sense is that it’s uncommon.” Both are absolutely true. That recognized, you can’t be a police officer and not have common sense. Sometimes, circumstances created by the job combine with controls on how we do the job and make us feel like there’s no common sense IN the job. Just as important as that is the fact that we regularly deal with people who act like they have no common sense. Those are the times when YOU have to act with the most common sense. Otherwise – and you know how this goes – you’ll be the one criticized no matter the circumstances. Common Sense – help make it common again.
Trust: When I saw “trust” I almost laughed. As law enforcement professionals and by the very nature of the work, trusting people can get us killed. On the other hand, we HAVE to trust some people every day. We have to trust our partner. We have to trust our backup. We have to trust our command structure. We have to trust our families and friends. Trust is an important part of our support system; the system we use to help minimize the stress overload that can accompany the work we do. While trust has to be earned (just like respect), don’t ever let yourself get in the frame of mind where you “can’t trust anyone.” There are people in our lives we should and do need to trust without doubt. Keep them in mind.
Patience: Anyone who has been a law enforcement professional for more than a week knows that patience is mandatory, for several reason, when doing the job. Patience in dealing with your command structure is important. Your priorities and their priorities don’t always match and it sometimes sucks to have to put their priorities first, requiring you to back-burner yours. Patience. Asking people questions on the street as you do basic field investigations as part of your job, and then having to sort through half-answers, slow answers, non-sensical answers… all takes patience. Dealing politely with people who are not polite to you, not because of who you are as a person, but because of the uniform you wear, takes a great deal of patience. Patience.
Class: This is one of those things that’s kind of hard to pin down and describe, but we all know we need to have it and act with it. I consider “class” as having some sense of… appropriateness. Sometimes that means having style. Sometimes that means acting with mercy. Sometimes that means being helpful and understanding or showing compassion. “Showing some class” is circumstance dependent – like so much of what we do – but if someone sees us acting “with class” it’s always a good thing. It’s a step in earning a measure of their respect. Stay classy, my friends.
Integrity: You simply can’t do the job and not have integrity. You’ll be put in too many situations which test yours and if you’re lacking, you’ll not be on the job long. Having integrity is what keeps you from “turning to the dark side.” Having integrity is what motivates you to decisions and actions that display your morals, earn you respect, display your character and prove your common sense.
Love: It may sound hokey, but let’s understand something: if you sacrifice it’s out of compassion. Compassion is motivated by love. You can’t sympathize or empathize with someone unless you have a sense of compassion and you can’t have that without knowing love. As police officers who have to display that constant “coldly professional” image, acknowledging the role of love in our job is something we’d likely rather avoid. Don’t. It’s real and it’s there and we can’t be good law enforcement professionals without it.
Ten things. I’m sure we could list more, identify in greater detail the value of each, etc. The bottom line is that, as police officers, deputies, patrol officer, troopers… no matter what label you wear, inside the uniform (or suit), under (or behind) that badge or star – to be a good, successful, not stressed out professional, you need to understand and embrace the necessity and value of those ten things.
Stay safe.
Lt. Frank Borelli (ret), Editorial Director | Editorial Director
Lt. Frank Borelli is the Editorial Director for the Officer Media Group. Frank brings 20+ years of writing and editing experience in addition to 40 years of law enforcement operations, administration and training experience to the team.
Frank has had numerous books published which are available on Amazon.com, BarnesAndNoble.com, and other major retail outlets.
If you have any comments or questions, you can contact him via email at [email protected].
