It was the year-end shift gathering and everyone on Mike's patrol company, as well as many of their spouses and significant others, were out for a casual dinner at a local Irish pub. At the party were two FNG's, you know, fabulous new guys, who had spent much of the past year working with the company, and who had expertly organized the gathering. One of them, who we will call Dave because that is his name, was there with his two dates. Dave is very charismatic and has no trouble keeping his social calendar full. His dates had traveled from several suburbs away and were both very attractive, but Dave kept being lured away by his true mistress, his rock, his... cell phone. No call went unanswered. No text message unchecked. He and the phone had become one. Althea considered smacking him on the nose with a rolled up menu to refocus him on the ladies already present and accounted for, but they didn't seem to mind. By the end of the evening, the group was wondering if he needed an intervention and a lift to a twelve step group for the "cell-phone-addicted."
Dave is not alone in his addiction. Recently out with friends at a local restaurant, we were seated next to a large table of more than twenty young adults. They all seemed to be close friends, greeting each other with hugs and back slaps as they arrived and then settling in to order food and drinks. Listening to their talk and laughter reminded us of our own college days; sitting in an all-night joint, drinking pot after pot of coffee, just talking and debating and enjoying each others company until the sun began to rise. We were stunned to look over at their table and realize that they were not talking and laughing with each other. Every single person at the table WAS TALKING ON A PHONE! It was as if they had all gathered for the purpose of calling people who were not even there.
And cell phones are not just phones anymore. Oh, no. The primitive stylings from the dark days of 2002 simply will not do! Not only have Blackberries (crackberries?) and iPhones brought the whole information superhighway to our fingertips, but our phones must now reflect our personalities. They have become us. Whole businesses thrive around personalized cell phone cases, flip covers, stickers, adornments, and ringtones to make our phone our own.
In truth, we also personalized our ringtones. Althea chose the song Basket Case by Green Day, because she is a big fan of the band and also, as a professional counselor, she found it ironic. This created an embarrassing moment during a therapy session. She generally puts her cell phone on vibrate and hides it deep in a desk drawer so no one will hear the buzzing noise it makes. One day she forgot to do this. As she was sitting down with a brand new client and asked him, "What brings you here today?" No sooner were the words out of her mouth when the ringtone started shouting "Do you have the time, To listen to me whine, About nothing and everything, All at once. I am one of those, Melodramatic fools, Neurotic to the bone, No doubt about it..." The client quickly learned about Althea's demented sense of humor. (Full disclosure: Mike's song is It's Hard out Here for a Pimp by Three 6 Mafia)
Cell phone technology has made great strides in just a couple decades. Remember the original "brick" phones? Talking on one made you look like you were calling in am artillery strike in an old WWII movie. They were expensive, heavy, got lousy reception and constantly dropped calls. Great technological advances have given us cells that are inexpensive, fit in your pocket, play games and music, connect to the internet, get lousy reception and constantly drop calls.
One officer of another department told us about an incident he witnessed while in roll call. A fabulous young officer got a call from ONE of his girlfriends. The ringtone was a very sexy women's voice expressing the need for specific sexual acts in colorful, explicit language. Definitely not appropriate in most social settings, but can you imagine the impression he made on his superiors and the teasing he got from fellow officers? We wonder what his mom thought of that ringtone.
When does having a cell phone cross the line into being a cell phone junkie? For each statement you identify with below, give yourself one point.
I already have an iPhone. Skip the test. Give yourself the highest score.
I text more words than I speak in a day. As Frank Borelli, editor for Officer.com, stated, "...our technology has now created a circumstance where we can communicate on a device made for talking WITHOUT HAVING TO TALK."
I power-up my cell phone as soon as the plane hits the runway.
I know all the features of my cell phone and use them.
I begin getting the shakes and start longing for the feel of a cell phone in my hand if I don't have it. According to John Jauch MA, Clinical Research Coordinator: "I have forgotten my iPhone at home several times and felt lost without it. I found myself unconsciously reaching for the missing phone in the empty pocket only to grow increasingly anxious and upset with myself for forgetting it. I obsessed about how to gain access to my messages and how to contact the people I needed to communicate with."
I own more than one cell phone, for just me. "I am so hooked up I have two backup cell phones. I will never be caught without at least one," stated Vincent C. Ruggiero, Divorce Attorney.
I upgrade my cell phone to a new model at least once a year.
My cell phone is decked out with accessories.
I take phone calls and respond to text messages while in the presence of another person. Add 1 point if you use a Nextel or Blackberry.
I obsessively check my phone for missed emails, calls, texts, and IMs. Dave Smith, creator of JD "Buck" Savage and national trainer for Street Survival Seminars stated, "Cell phones are addictive since they leave us in suspense waiting for the next communication. This is especially true when we are anticipating a communication from someone we really want to hear from for whatever reason."
I could never turn off my cell phone. Not even in church.
I constantly run over my minutes or have unlimited calling.
My cell phone bill equals my car payment.
I believe my cell phone keeps me organized. Sgt. Betsy Brantner-Smith of Naperville PD, author, national trainer, and "star" of soon to be released TV show Female Forces stated, "I'm amazed at how truly nervous I get when I forget my personal phone at home or leave the Nextel in the station... it's weird! What the heck did I do 10 years ago?!"
Scoring
0 - 3: Clean and addiction free
4 - 7: Careful this is where the line begins to blur
8 - 10: DANGER!!!! You're at risk of sliding into junkie hood
11 - 14: Check into rehab. You are a full fledge addict!
